2020-07-15 The End is the Beginning

Spoiler alert. The world ends with a whimper and not a bang.

I traveled into the future yesterday and found that all endings are an open door to the beginning and all beginnings are glasses full of possibility. Drink it down people. Get drunk on it and savor every drop. Realize that when it’s half gone, it’s still half full.

Yesterday was a long string of zoom meetings. Strange how one could be so sick of inviting other human beings into their home yet still crave being with them and hearing what they have to say. Still wanting to be a part of the chaos. It’s the reason I’m back at it today. To try again.

Yesterday when it was all over I met my love in the backyard. We slid into the hot tub together letting that warm water smooth our aching minds. He asked me how my day was and I proceeded to lament. That lasted about 60 seconds at which point he asked, “is the glass really that half empty?”

Then silence fell between us as I thought about his question. I look around. It’s the height of summer. All the flowers I’ve planted in pots around The backyard are in bloom and the ivy is taking over the bricks. I’ve positioned the Mandevilla just so, the tendrils reach up and grab a strand of the ivy. The vines have become intertwined and one uses the other to grow in its preferred direction. One climbs up and the other down. I engineered that on purpose.

The sky grows thick with dense grey clouds and I can feel that relief is imminent. It will rain. My eyes weary and in need of the rain. I think about how fortunate I have been to have met Jim. To be sitting here, at the precipice of a summer storm, contemplating life and our future together. I say “of course it’s not half empty. It’s over half full.”

Later, we are in the theatre room getting ready to watch the series finale of “Dark.” He doesn’t push play right away. Instead he goes into a bit of a monologue about meeting me and how things are how they should be and how he could not imagine a life without me. He believes in fate. His statements are less about the overarching story of our lives and more about how it is to take every day as another chance to make the most of what we’ve been given.

We’ve had choices, but could we look back and say we would have chosen differently? I don’t think so.

We both spend most of our days tending to responsibilities we’ve committed to that don’t have anything to do with each other. Some days we only see each other and really get to talk for an hour or so. But we get to look forward to that time every day. I sometimes forget that.

His words were both poignant and heart felt. I agreed with what he said by squeezing his hand and looking in his eyes. And with a simple ‘thank you’.

Then he pushed play and we watched the show. Together.

The end of the day is just an open door to tomorrow.

The day ends as I slip my weary soul between cool sheets and rest my head on a pillow that quickly forms a nook the shape of my neck. I close my eyes and tell the universe I need rain. The rain has been so elusive lately.

Today I wake to dark skies and rain. I say “thank you.” My glass is full again.

I get up and shuffle to the kitchen. I make Jim breakfast and we sit at the table together talking about the plans we have for this day. A full day of work at the office for him and a full day of zooms for me.

Did I kiss him goodbye as he left? I can’t quite recall.

Peace and Love,
~Miss SugarCookie

2020-07-14 Doodles and the Art of (Not) Doing

It’s gonna be a full day today and I’ve got no time to lament. That’s good news. Maybe if I have idle I should turn to meditation or some other positive and productive activity instead of letting my brain spin out. I mean, not maybe. That’s what I should do. I know that, but I don’t always do what I should. Who does that anyhow??!!

Not human beings. That’s for sure.

I find it interesting that I’ve been walking on a treadmill and writing as part of my normal routine for so long that it’s tough to separate the two. If I’m on the treadmill I feel as though I should have my phone out, making my thumbs work. It’s also odd that if I have a spare half an hour I feel as though I should do something productive like walking. Somewhere along the way I’ve forgotten how to just sit and do nothing.

Have I ever known how to to that? Maybe not. It’s probably why I have a stack of paper notebooks full of writing from my youth. It’s probably why all my school notebooks are full of doodles. Not that doodles are productive, but it’s something that kept my hands busy while daydreaming about my life in alternate universes.

Speaking of alternate universes.. Jim and I are one episode away from finishing the “Dark” series. It’s a mind bender for sure. The time travel gets so twisted and as if that wasn’t enough, the third season introduces the “alternate realities” aspect. It’s so complex now I can’t even keep all of it straight in my head. That’s about the time I lose interest in something.

My brain is so overloaded that it doesn’t want to have to think too much about entertainment on top of everything else.

It’s a delicate balancing act. Being just busy enough to get some satisfaction and not so busy that it causes stress.

I read an article once about the US presidents who had a tendency to doodle. There were even pictures of some of the doodles. There’s some science about what the brain is doing when that’s going on. I can tell you people often think if a person is doodling they are not paying attention. I know that’s not true. I think it’s actually the opposite. That there is a more focused effort to listen and process what is being said.

I bet our current president doesn’t ever doodle. He’s too busy running his mouth and tweeting and being a complete ass-hat to sit still and listen. I digress.

It’s Tuesday today which means we’ll be having tacos for dinner and also that I’ve got to fold the towels and takeout the trash. The neighborhood has reduced our recycling to once every two weeks and I’m not sure what I’m gonna do about that. At my old house I had a large recycle bin and they came once a week. It was great. I was able to reduce our trash to very little and filled that bin up on the regular.

In this house/neighborhood we have 3 of those small bins (all that I somehow have picked up along the years) and with two adults and four teenagers we fill them up in like a week. So what am I supposed to do with all this recycling??!! And why are we reducing the pickup days??!! Why are we going in the wrong direction??!!

Why do humans often not do what they should? 🤷‍♀️

That’s gonna be it for today. Time to go listen and doodle my day away until it’s time to break for tacos. 😉

~Miss SugarCookie

2020-07-13 Prognosis Pending

Mostly I’m just tired of saying I’m tired. Mostly I’m looking in the mirror and wondering if I’ll ever not feel tired. Or look tired. Some days it takes all the energy I have to appear awake and aware of what’s happening in the small, medium, and large circles I’m turning in these days.

This week it will be 5 weeks since I crashed hard. Had the worst day I’ve had in a great while and broke down and went to see a doctor. An internist. I could barely get through that experience. He set me straight but in the course of that visit he had me fill out some paper forms. Quizzes. One or two had to do with mental health.

It’s not the first time a doctor has suggested I was depressed. But saying someone is depressed is as nondescript as diagnosing someone with happiness. Here’s a 10 question quiz, and we’re going to add up your points and say “congratulations, you’re happy!!”.

I was in so much distress, I don’t remember a single question. I probably answered fairly negatively given the fact that the world is caught in a vortex of doom and I felt like a hot pile of garbage. The immediate action plan that day was to get me off the benzodiazepines and then start addressing the “other” issues.

Ok. Now it’s 5 weeks later and I’ve got my follow up appointment on Thursday this week. I’m down to a quarter pill (.5 mg Lorazapam) a night, with an off night (no dose) about every three nights. I’m ahead of schedule and have been pushing hard for that through some unpleasant side effects. I just want to be done.

Of course, the sleep issues have returned. Waking up early and not being able to fall back asleep. Jim says I need to try some techniques to calm my brain and it sounds like maybe meditation would help. But what’s the doctor going to focus on I wonder? The sleep? The depression? The progress I’m making with the meds and the side effects? Will he make me take those paper quizzes again? Will I score better now that I’m feeling better?

Will the doctor suggest I see a counselor or therapist again? Should I consider that?

Will I wake up at 5 again tomorrow with all these questions plus 47 more about work and the kids and school and the pandemic and the meaning of life and my purpose In it?

When he asks me how I’m feeling I’ll probably say that mostly I’m just tired of saying I’m tired. Saying any more than that will just take too much energy. Good grief!

I’m on the treadmill and looking in the mirror in front of me. At least my hair looks good. That seems familiar.

That’s enough already,
~Miss SugarCookie

2020-07-12 Insults and Injuries and Finding the Bright Spots In-between

I’ve been in a funk for a few days now. Just frustrated, you know with progress trying to improve my health being so slow. And feeling like garbage every day. And then to have this injury on my foot preventing me from walking was like.. like adding injury to insult.

It’s totally taken me out of my routine and work has, of course not helped. Then yesterday I was like, well, I gotta snap out and look for ways to re-engage with life. I made a plan to participate in as much of summer residency as I could. I’m not enrolled but it’s all virtual because of the pandemic. Some is pre-recorded video which I may not have access to but some of it is zoom. So I highlighted all the things I could tune in for on the schedule. Yesterday was the first full day of content.

I jumped on the Zoom for two lectures and one of the faculty reading events plus the “Library Pub” meet-up after the faculty reading. It was satisfying in the way that I felt I was doing something and was with a group I felt I belonged to. Seeing all the tiny zoom squares with other students and faculty was nice. Sad that it can’t be in person but, you know, just familiar enough that I finally felt the funk start to fade a bit.

Then I checked my email. In it was not 1 but 3 messages from the program coordinator reminding me that the content was for current students and faculty only. One message to remind me, which was very tactful. A second message that provided some reasoning behind it which was kind of snarky (and in my opinion, just a bunch of BS). And a third message confirming what events are “off limits” and what events are ok to attend. Completely unnecessary.

Apparently the graduating student events are within the legal limits. So I guess that’s going to have to be enough for this go round. But it still irks me, you know. I mean what freaking difference does it make to have one more person join a meeting??! It’s not like I am taking advantage to the point where I’m trying to participate in student-only content like workshops or mentor introduction sessions. It’s just tuning in to watch someone give a lecture or do a reading.

If the residency was in person, there would be alumni and / or other folks who pop in to the session and sit and watch. Yes, it’s in sort of a remote location, but people in the local Omaha metro area are close enough to visit for a day or a session.

I dunno. Maybe I’m taking advantage of the system, but it’s not doing anyone any harm. After reading the emails, I felt a little bummed. It’s like.. like it added insult to injury.

These layers of insult and injury are frustrating. I’m literally trying to walk right now and the treadmill and a set at 2.5, slower than my usual pace. I’m limping along trying to walk in a way that does not involve the big toe of my right foot. It’s both ridiculous and annoying. Whatever.

It’s Sunday and the house is sleeping-in. I’ve probably got at least another hour before people start to emerge from their rooms. I need to put my energy into something and think I might return to poetry submissions in the spirit of focusing on my “writing life” in leu of not being able to participate in Res the way I’d like.

Today Z and I are going shopping for dorm room essentials. It’s one of the things she’s been looking forward to for quite a while now.

She’s enthusiastic about living on her own and getting to decorate that space, however tiny. And getting to do that with her is another bright spot that I can’t dismiss. She’s been showing me pictures from the internet with other people’s dorm rooms and we’ve been discussing color combinations and all the ways to make the space functional.

I’m excited for her and really embracing the sliver of hope that it can all happen as planned. I’m trying to push away the thought that this experience will be stolen from her as well. The damn pandemic can’t last forever. She’s got a world of experiences ahead of her and I need to help her focus on the positive.

If I could only give myself the same pep-talk. Ha!

Anyway. I’ve successfully limped my way through about an hour of music and musing about life. As it often does, it has made me feel better. And that is good.

Time to get to that poetry submission thing I said that I was going to try this morning.

Peace and love,
~Miss SugarCookie

2020-07-11 Convenience Store Blues

This week was crazy busy. Mostly work, but there was also a string of other situations popping out that needed immediate attention.

I went on a walk with a friend I haven’t seen since January on Tuesday and had a flip-flop mishap that ended in a seriously gory scene. The bottom of my big toe got scalped and though I can still walk, it’s a struggle and had left me highly unmotivated about treadmill time.

I’m on the treadmill now and looking at myself in the gym mirror and can’t really remember the last time I showered. How does THAT happen. I look a mess. It matches the way I feel, kinda

I know I have to take the decommission of the benzodiazepines slow, but I’m loosing patience and just kinda just want to be over it. I’ve got this shitty feeling every damn day. I’m on half mg of lorazepam now. It’s a quarter of a full pill and still I’m feeling like crap most nights. I worry I’ll still feel like this even after I’m off it. What then??!

I might be grumpy this AM because I should be at residency with my MFA peeps and I’m not. The stupid pandemic is preventing life from going according to plan and I’m just exhausted by it emotionally.

Workshops, lectures, readings. This was supposed to be my graduating residency and Since it’s all virtual I opted for plan b which was to defer to Winter. Now I feel I’m missing out. Hmmmmph!

There’s so much going on I’m thinking about but my motivation to walk and write is just not there. Hopefully I’ll get some mo-jo back soon.

Peace and Love,
~Miss SugarCookie

2020-07-06 Not Ready for Monday

I’ve had a lovely string of satisfying days, despite the interruption of so many aggressive firework fiends on the loose.

I really needed the holiday weekend to do for myself and forget about work and just enjoy life as a wife.

We tried for a bike ride on the 4th but it was too hot and though it was great to be alone together and get some fresh air and sunshine, the cool comfort of our living room was much more enticing. We were only out on the trail for an hour.

We ended up watching some shows—A few episodes of Dark season three, one episode of a show called unsolved mysteries (I think), and an episode of Star Trek discovery. I also worked on revising some poems with the hope of submitting something. I almost reached the finish line with that. Hopefully I won’t lose my motivation today before I pull done triggers.

We also lit off a handful of fireworks and I was reminded, once again, one of the reasons I hate the holiday. All the constant explosions and noise and thick smoke contesting the air. The only escape is possibly being out of the city. It’s really ridiculous.

I think that got to me. You know.. all of it and I ended up feeling sick with a headache on Saturday night. Laying in bed at 11:40pm, not able to get relief or fall asleep, the fireworks were still going off. It was awful. Sunday was a nice recovery.

My kids come home today and it’s back to business as usual. It’s going to be a super busy work week and I hope I’ve had enough restoration to face that.

I’m actually not feeling inclined to keep walking or trying to think of what to write about this morning. I mean I feel like I have lots to talk about, but nothing feels pressing. Maybe that’s ok.

It’s probably because I’m not feeling like walking either. The advantage of coming down off of the sleep aid medication is that I won’t have any side effects anymore, but the flipside of that coin is that my sleep issues have resurfaced and I have started waking up early and not being able to go back to sleep.

That struggle is real.

However, Monday is rolling and ready or not and I just need to get on it and see where it goes.

~Miss SugarCookie

2020-07-04 Cheers to New Poetry and Spending Quality Time this 4th of July 🌟

I’m leading with the poem I wrote yesterday instead of including it as an afterthought at the end. The tag line? “Look Ma, it’s a Love Poem!!”

Driving Toward Sunset on July 2nd

Yesterday was a pretty good day. I had two good virtual catch up sessions with friends, I attended a poetry workshop where I learned something and wrote a poem, and also managed to not do a lot of work and focus on doing things that made me feel satisfied.

And I took a shower.. super bonus plan!!

Of the aforementioned things I would say that the most noteworthy was the poem. I can count on one hand the number of poems I’ve written since February. It was so satisfying to not only write it, but immediately apply what I learned in the workshop to find the right form.

The workshop was with Paul Tram and it was one of the more educational workshops I’ve attended. Many have great topics and prompts, but we actually evaluated a poem and he revealed all it had to offer. We then took that formula and wrote our own.

Even more noteworthy than that was the fact that I wrote a love poem!! I mean I’ve written hundreds of poems but love poems are rare among them. For whatever reason, being in love or loving someone does not inspire words within me typically. I’m more inclined to write about life when my heart is breaking, when I’m down and struggling (except in a pandemic when I apparently can’t put more than two stanzas together).

I’m extremely grateful for the workshop and the day off and.. not to be dismissed.. my love who has been on my mind quite a bit tough he’s only been “out of town” for about 36 hours. We’re planning to go on a bike ride today.

Now I’ve got quite a backstory about my history with 4th of July—too much to go into detail here, But I will say I’ve had my share of ups and downs and steps backwards and forwards in the last 10 to 12 years. I’m really looking forward to establishing new traditions and re-shaping old ones.

The poem probably says it best, though.

I’m going to close with that today. I was up early and am feeling hungry and ready to dive into my chores so the house is in good order for Jim’s return and for the activities we have planned for the day.

Wishing all a safe and satisfying day.
Thanks for reading,
~Miss SugarCookie

2020-07-03 Yes, Person I’ve Never Met, I’m Judging You 😷

I almost wrote this post a few weeks ago after I had to make a trip to the pool supply store to get out pool water tested to make sure the chemicals were safe and balanced for swimming.

Most of the trips I make outside the house are to get groceries or pick up prescriptions. The occasional quick trip into the hardware store, putting my mask on like a good human each time (though the pharmacy has a drive through so that’s nice).

It’s difficult not to observe the other humans and their choices. I’m naturally a pretty judgmental person. In a non-pandemic world, I would be scanning the crowds and throwing side eyes at people’s choices of clothing and hairstyle. I know, I know, “do not judge, lest you be judged”, but I’m only human. Now with the pandemic, all bets are off.

I don’t care if you’re wearing your pajamas or slippers in the grocery store, but if you’re not wearing a mask. I’m judging you. I can’t escape it.

And as a person who does make these regular trips outside of my household, I can’t help but detect trends and have my finger on the pulse of the attitude of the people. It’s definitely shifted in the last month with the easing of restrictions.

A month ago, almost everyone at the grocery store was wearing a mask and now it’s about 50/50. I haven’t been to the hardware store in a while, but the last time I went masks were still required. However I’ve also noticed a rise in people not wearing masks correctly. It doesn’t do anyone any good to wear a mask over your mouth when your nose is still hanging out. It defeats the purpose, why wear a mask at all? Good grief!

Circling back to the pool store, at the time everyone in the grocery store was wearing a mask. So when I put my mask on and went into the pool store I was shocked to find that none of the customers nor the employees were wearing masks. I felt like I was walking into a bizarro world where the pandemic did not exist. What the hell?!

My next over-arching thought was that all these people who have pools are too pretentious or assuming and thinking that they are above wearing a mask for some reason. No, the fact that you have a pool at your house does not eliminate the possibility that you’re going to get the virus. Just because you have a business with a pool or a house with a pool and probably have money does not mean that you are not also vulnerable. I was actually disgusted by that thought process. And there I was among them.

Now I’m not saying I’ve made the best choices all along either. I did have a meet up with friends a few weeks ago where we were outside most of the time and 6 feet apart most of the time and not wearing our masks. Again, I am only human too.

Yesterday, I had the need to go to a few different stores for items for the Fourth of July and was once again irritated by the fact that almost no one was wearing a mask. I was wearing mine, but in the minority. I also happen to drive by several businesses with glass fronts and saw lots of tables full of people inside enjoying a meal or a drink. Not a lot of social distancing going on there.

Every single day this week the news has been full of the fact that positive cases are on the rise, hospitalizations are on the rise, resources are beginning to get scarce again, especially in a few of the more popular and densely populated states. California Florida Texas… All hotbeds of activity for this virus.

My daughters high school graduation was canceled and rescheduled three times. And the latest date that has been on the calendar for a few weeks now is August 2. If the trend continues that will be called off completely. A week after that she supposed to move into her dorm room at college. How on earth can those things happen if People keep ignoring the fact that the virus is still spreading and will likely not be contained until there’s an approved vaccination that’s widely available.

One last note on this… I heard a bit of a narrative on the news this morning that asked the question, “how would all of this be different if you could actually see the virus? What if there were outward physical symptoms that you could see or that the virus was big enough that you could detect when it was exiting someone’s body through their breath and falling to the ground?”

I think about this and imagine little grey particles with tufts of red fuzz floating in the air and slowly dropping to the ground. I imagine seeing someone standing in the grocery store, contemplating what type of hamburger buns to buy with the covid emerging out their mouth with their every breath and landing on those plastic wrappers. They pick one and put it in their cart and then change their mind and put it back. The packages in the store are covered in virus until the grey and red spots start to fade away.

People would be wearing masks, I am sure of it. They would be more inclined to because the inherent risk of not wearing one would be more obvious. I mean, almost everyone who gets into a car puts their seatbelt on. 1.) We have seen what has happened when you don’t wear a seatbelt, either in video or in real life. 2.) in many, many states it’s the law.

So why can’t we just enforce it with the law? Law enforcement is to serve and protect. I know that there’s been a lot of negative press about the police lately and for good reason, but law enforcement is still necessary and it might help if we had some local laws that people had to abide by or suffer some penalty. At the very least, business that just followed the rules and also enforced the wearing of masks. Again, just my opinion.

And as a collective group, we are only as good as our lowest common denominator. But people don’t seem to care and there appears to be a lot of low denominators out there. Yeah.. I’m looking at you complete stranger in the checkout line in front of me at the Whole Foods. The life you save by wearing a mask could be your own, or your moms, or someones child. Don’t be that asymptomatic virus shedder galavanting around town without a mask!! Just don’t.

Yes, I know this post is very preachy and very judge-y. My opinions are my own of course. But I just wish that people would realize that their choice not to wear a mask affects more than just themselves.

OK, that’s probably enough of a frustrated-human-sugar-cookie rant for one day. But I had to vent for a minute and that’s kinda what this blog is for (sometimes).

Enjoy your holiday. Peace Out,
~Miss SugarCookie

2020-07-02 Between last night and today 🌙 … ☀️

Last night, as I neared the end of my day, my brain was full of all kinds of things to say. I felt happy and satisfied and looking forward to today and this holiday weekend and the rest of this summer. I should have gotten out my notebook and put pen to paper. I should have tried to capture the fine details of those moments. I didn’t.

Instead, I opted to just cruise through my evening enjoying the feeling. I opted to take a drive with Jim and watch a show and go to bed early.

And today I can’t remember what I was thinking. Whatever it was has dissolved into the abyss. I’m tired from not sleeping well and no longer excited about the day. My list already seems too long and unmanageable. I’ve got all day to get stuff done but just don’t want to do any of it.

Something happened between last night and today and isn’t that strange? Probably not.

My kids are at their Dad’s for the holiday and Jim is taking his boys camping for a few days too. So I’m going to be solo most of the next 48 hours. Last night I was inspired by the prospect of doing my own thing for a couple of days. And today, I’m already feeling kinda alone.

Maybe that’s the cause of my mood shift? Or maybe it’s the realization that even though I’m alone, I still have a ton of things to get done and will not really even have a choice of what to do.

It could also be this string of depressing songs that are coming up in my iPhone shuffle this morning. 🤷‍♀️

Life is strange and mysterious. And, that’s just about all I have to say about things today.

~Miss SugarCookie

2020-07-01 Change is Sometimes Neither Fast Nor Easy

About 16 days ago I decided I had enough of feeling shitty every freaking day and set out on a mission to figure it out and turn things around. i decided the first step was to do a substance cleanse and get my body free of chemicals that alter my mood, help me sleep or calm my anxiety. I was all-in and knew it was what needed to happen.

I vowed that I would cut that shit out for 15 days and then re-evaluate to see how I was feeling and add other mods into my routine. Give myself an uptick in good behaviors like hydration and eating more fruits and veg. But I found out pretty quickly that i couldn’t just make a declaration and it would magically come to pass.

Day 2 I felt like garbage and by day 3 I was throwing my hands up in the air in despair. I honestly didn’t know I was suffering withdrawal until I saw a physician and heard his assessment. That day was one of the worst I’ve ever had. And the relief I felt when I gave in and took a Xanax and went back to bed was all the proof I needed that he was right.

So instead of cold turkey, I’m taking it slow and reducing my dose in small increments. The prescribed plan is like 12 weeks but I’ve been working the numbers and charting my dose and symptoms and think I can do it it 8. That’s still a lot longer than the 2 weeks I was originally hoping for.

I’ve also not been able to cut out caffeine. But I’ve been charting my headaches too and have minimized my daily intake quite a bit. Like I said, it’s been about 16 days since I stomped my foot and declared these changes, and I have successfully reduced the caffeine to about 1 cup of coffee a day. It feels like a win to me.

Of course the third part of my substance trifecta was alcohol. I haven’t had a sip since June 13. It’s been the easiest part of my plan by far. I think the first time I really missed it was when I returned from Colorado and Jim suggested we have a few drinks while I fill him in on the details of my trip. I declined (but still spent a fair bit of talking about everything Z and I saw and did).

Despite the change-up In the master plan and slowing some things down considerably, I can still feel an improvement in my health. I feel better waking up in the morning and am not dreading the day like I was. I’m starting to be excited again about the things going on in my life instead of feeling so burdened by responsibility.

And I am actually sleeping better even though I’m not taking as much of the Lorazepam as I was. That’s freaking incredible. I’m just now rolling into week 3 of my 8 week plan but already looking forward to the day when I’m done-done with that shit!

All of this validates that change is sometimes neither fast or easy. But it’s always good to have goals and measures so you can keep track of how it’s going.

Also not to be dismissed is the need for a llama in the story. Something interesting, something to look forward to, something that’s providing internal satisfaction.. feeding the soul.

The llama in my “Take Back the City Tour” was the road trip I took with my daughter. It was very restorative to disconnect from work and get a change in scenery for a few days. The mental health variable in the grand equation of overall health is so important. Everything is connected!

Today is the first day of the second half of 2020. We are half a year into what will probably go down in history as one of the most trying years of the century. No human can escape the impact of the pandemic. No person in America is isolated from events that are changing the climate of our country.. politically, socially, economically.

There too, change is painful and a struggle. It’s a large scale example of what neither fast nor easy looks like. But as I have hope that I can find peace and health for myself, so too do I have hope that we as a society can take steps toward positive change.

I don’t have any answers but I know that “cold turkey” is not the Way.

I digress. I’m officially calling today the end of my “Tour” and will return now, somewhat, to my regularly scheduled programming. I’ll still be on the lookout for the next Llama or Ostrich. Everyone should make time for that!

Peace and Love,
~Miss SugarCookie