2018-01-01 Ringing In My Ears

It must be New Years, because there’s ringing in my ears. It’s a nice departure from all those songs that are always stuck in my head. Truth.

As I comb through some of my poetry to decide what’s good, bad, worthy, worth giving another look, or just plain ready for the “X-file”, I’m noticing more than just a couple of times I mention music. More specifically having a song stuck in my head or a song that reminds me of a particular feeling or moment in my life. I think that’s pretty common, but why does it seem important enough to keep bubbling up?

I don’t have the answer, of course, or I would not be asking the question. I’ve got lots of questions, as always, and never as many answers. At least today, as a new year breaks the horizon and starts to rise, I have the answer to the cliffhanger question that has been stirring all week and hit its apex yesterday. The question was who my mentor will be this semester.

Now I know, and am quite pleased about the result. In all honesty, I’m not sure there would have been a bad pairing, Just different. Still, I think that my mentor is ideal for me and where I am in my “writing life” right now.

If there’s one thing I’ve had to come to terms with very quickly this week is just how green I am. I really want to impress people but there’s no way to get around a question when it’s asked.

“So who do you like to read? Who are your favorites?”. I’ve been asked this question by one person or another at least four times. The first time was the first night at dinner, I just fumbled and in a very round-about way replied something that indicated that I don’t know. Epic fail.

The second and third times I formulated a little better of an answer which also indicated that I didn’t have any but with some context of my history and the fact that I’ve never studied literature or poetry. That’s no excuse of course, but it made me feel a little better and at least I was being honest.

Then I started leading with that honesty bit. I think by that time I had come to terms with just how truly uneducated I am about fine arts. For the love of god, one of the lecturers asked the question today in class about free verse and I had no clue what the answer was. I’m in a masters program for poetry and that’s something I should know.

I’ve taken so many secret little notes for things I need to look up later. I know in a few short weeks our first assignments will be due and I’m scared as hell I won’t be able to process everything from residency AND do a quality job on that.

On the brighter side, I’ve written about 3 new poems and have fodder for about a dozen more. I can’t even begin to describe how fantastic that is (except I just did).

Maybe the next time someone asks who I like, I should just look them straight in the eye and say REM, Cake, One Republic, Fall Out Bot, And Blue October. That will give them a tiny window into my brain.

Tomorrow is the day for student readings. I’m going last. That’s probably a mistake, but it is what it is and like everything else, it WILL be ok.

Keep On Ringing, Keep On Singing.

Happy New Year!

~Miss SugarCookie

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