Yesterday I took my kids shopping for school supplies. It was an effort to get them to face reality – school starts this week (today for C and tomorrow for Z). No more sleeping past noon and staying up super late. How late I don’t know because I typically fall asleep around 10PM.
They actually went to their dads yesterday and as I dropped them off it felt so strange. It seems like I always have them on the first day of school, get to take pictures and drop them off. This week I won’t get to do that and it just feels wrong. I guess it’s one of those things that goes along with being divorced and co-parenting. I’m glad they have another parent who loves them and takes care (mostly), but that doesn’t make moments like these any easier. After I dropped them off and kissed them goodbye I want home and packed all my weekly needs into my car and, after work, headed for Jim’s house.
That’s tough too. I mean, I look forward to spending quality time, and he has done everything to make his house feel like a second home, but that does not change the fact that I’m leaving the space that is my sanctuary.
I commented to a friend this past week that I like working from home and really like to be at my house and don’t really even like going out that much. It is true I am just going from one house to another, but packing like I’m going on vacation and taking all my work stuff and my cat and any groceries I don’t want to spoil is tiresome.
As soon as I landed here last night I was late for a conference call and got right back to work. After that we had dinner and I was just tired and feeling rotten. Sad, missing the kids already and upset that the cats were fighting already and feeling like I had not done enough that day.
We sat outside as the sky grew dark and talked through it. He helped me recognize it was just all the transition that had been getting to me. He’s right.
I tried to look on the bright sides, but my mood was lost. I kinda figured a good night sleep was the only thing to allow for some recovery. I was right.
I woke up this morning feeling refreshed and ready to take on the day. True that I’m going to miss taking C to his first day of HS but he’ll do fine and he’s just a phone call away. I’ve got a full day of school and work ahead and without interruptions I should be able to get tons done. The same holds true for the rest of the week. I just need to focus on that.
Right now, I’m going to focus on my workout and then I’m gonna hit this Tuesday where it hurts. Time to jam.