The Break’s Over? What break? 

The one where I don’t have to drive to the hospital every damn day, check in at the front desk to get my Covid clearance sticker, and sit at my mom’s bedside. 

We checked into the hospital yesterday afternoon and she went into surgery this morning. I was there when they took her down to pre-op and so was my sister, thank goodness. If there’s a saving grace in this go-round it’s that restrictions have eased up a bit and two designated people can visit instead of just one. That means I’ll get some breaks at being the designated daughter. 

This surgery is to “de-bulk” her insides and clear out any residual tumor tissue. She’s been in chemo for six months to eradicate the cancer cells, but physical tumor still exists. They are also going to remove her spleen, ovaries, uterus, Fallopian tubes, appendix and maybe her gallbladder and parts of her large and small intestines. “Anywhere the Cancer can hide,” they said. They are also going to to be working to reconnect her lower intestine to remove the ostomy. She will likely have an ileostomy when it’s said and done, but we’ll see. 

Exactly when we’ll see is the burning question. “Ten plus hours” they said. They took her down at 7am but I didn’t get kicked out until 8. AND I didn’t revive the automated text message that the procedure had started until 9:46. I can’t know if that’s when it actually started or when someone finally got to doing whatever it was in the system to trigger the text. 

In any case, it’s a long wait. But I’ve got a full complement of other things to keep me busy in the meantime—a never ending pile of GLR work, house chores, and of course a new episode of Bachelor in Paradise to watch. 

Truth be told I already watched like 45 minutes of that while getting my cardio. You know those shirts that say “but first… <insert thing here>? I need one that says “but first… trash TV” 😜

The timing of all of this seems to have worked out. I just finished sending everything to my publisher last week and at the moment most of the decisions about pieces for the next issue of the lit mag are still in the hands of our editing teams. So there’s nothing really pressing for me to do. Don’t get me wrong, there’s still lots that could be done, as I said “a pile” but not an urgent pile. 

I’m not worried about the surgery at all. I have utmost faith in the surgeon and my mom is otherwise very healthy. It’s a lot for a 74 year old woman to go through. I’m many ways it’s the recovery I’m dreading more than anything but trying not to think about that too much. 

So that’s it. Today is the day this Cancer business takes over my life again. And with that, I need need need to get back to watching my trash TV. 

With peace and love and pumpkin-spiced sweet-nothings, 

~Miss SugarCookie

PS. Take Over, the Breaks Over is actually a Fall Out Boy song. One of my favorites actually.