2019-10-04 Un-caffeinated Wanderings

Pick a title.. any title. Spin the wheel, where it stops nobody knows. Except when they do… 🤔

I’m like 2 weeks into operation “good good night” where we make some life changes to get better sleep. We kicked the cats out and I no longer drink water after 7pm to limit my trips to the bathroom at 4am. The next phase in the plan was to reduce the caffeine intake and let me tell you. Let me just tell you I’m coming to terms with the fact that my willpower to resist caving in on some resolve is apparently approaching non existent. Which is to say, it’s tough.

I used to get caffeine from no-doz pills in the name of saving myself from those unnecessary calories of sugar and cream I have when I have a cup of coffee. Then I would end up having a coffee anyway. Total face palm. And just so we’re clear, when I say “I used to”, what I mean is like everyday for a few years now up until two days ago.

Yesterday was the first day I did not have that morning shot of caffeine and it wasn’t that bad. By mid afternoon I was totally craving a coffee (not that that’s any different than any other day) and I caved and had that. I was truly surprised that I didn’t have any headache. I would have expected a slight withdrawal factor but maybe the afternoon coffee was enough.

That makes today day 2 and I’m on the treadmill now and obviously thinking about it because it’s the first thing I went for when I started to write. For a person that walks through days exhausted often, that little boost was so great. I sound like an addict. Wait… is that what an addict sounds like? I dunno.. I just really want that boost.

That’s enough about that mess. Seriously.. so many other things to focus on.

My daughter applied to UNO for her undergrad and already got an acceptance letter. That was yesterday and I’m all like woohoo!! She also applied at UNL and UNK and told me in the car that she would never go to UNL, that she hated that campus and the school was too large. I’m scratching my head about it. “Why did you apply?”.

Apparently the after school program she participates in had them apply at several in-state options. She’s also looking into a few schools in Missouri and Kansas and I need to help her work through the options. I also suggested Colorado and Iowa schools and she just sort of gives me this look. She said she won’t go to an Iowa school and I just can’t quite figure out why. She has no good reason. I’m good with whatever.. just happy she’s decided going somewhere far away is not for her. That’s not for me either. I need my Pudding Pie to stay close to home.

I’m super excited for her. This year is already going super fast. Too fast.

Speaking of things going too fast.. my wedding day is now less than 4 months away and I’m needing to kick planning into gear this month! I literally spent the whole month of September like a zombie and didn’t do shit. I mean about anything. I did the minimum requirements and crossed about 1 of 20 things off my monthly to to-do list. Now.. there’s not enough room left on my whiteboard for more and there’s about 20 new things that need to get done this month. I’m starting to feel like I’m approaching panic mode but still can’t find the motivation to do stuff.

I probably just need some caffeine or something. 🤣

I think I was able to do 1 thing on my list each day I would be in good shape by the end of the month. I want to be able to roll into the cold months not having anything I have to get out for.

Anyway, it’s Friday again and I’m excited for the weekend. I’m excited to get to spend some QT with Jim getting stuff done here at the house. I feel like I barely see him during the week. I’m hoping the weather outside is good for yard work. We have a ton of fall cleanup to do. It’s just one of those things about fall I do enjoy. That and sitting and sipping a hot cup of coffee or some latte. Oh my my.. my brain is a one track mind sometimes. ☕️

I’m sticking to my resolve today though. I need to prove to myself that my willpower still exists. That I can have the same kind of resolve that I did years ago when I’m put my mind to something. I kinda want to prove that age is not the cause of my problems. That I can still be like 32 any day of the week if I want to (though I used to say 24). Ha!

Nobody wants to be 24. Ick!! At 24 you’re so young and stupid and you still think you know everything about life. You haven’t been cut to your knees yet by life. And all that misery is still in your future. No thanks.

My misery is behind me now and I’m just gonna say “no thanks” when life offers me more (I know it will). Come to think of it, most of my worst adult misery was between the ages of 32 and 44 so perhaps I don’t want to be 32 either. 🤔

Today my goal is to submit a set of poems to a publication and do some revising of some new stuff and get back on my exercise game. Tonight there’s a poetry reading at Kaneko and I’m planning to go to that too. Plus.. at least 1 other thing on my October to-do list.

That’s it! Times up. Thanks for playing along.

Cheers to the Weekend,

~Miss SugarCookie

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