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2020-04-09 Naturally Nervous

It doesn’t matter if I’ve known you my whole life or if we’ve just met. I’ll be nervous thinking about getting together. I’ll spend too much time thinking about it, worrying, wondering how it will go. It doesn’t matter if I’ve conducted a hundred meetings, each next one is a challenge. I’m naturally nervous. We…
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2020-04-07 Feels Like Summer (According to My Kids)

My time is short today. I’ve already squandered most of my walking/writing time doing chores and talking to my daughter who has been UP ALL NIGHT! 😱 She’s sporting her full teenager attitude this morning, half sweet talking me so I’ll make her breakfast and half “talk to the hand” when I press her on…
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2020-04-06 New Day, New Week, Same Ole Set-List

Monday again and for the first time in many, many days the alarm clock woke me up today. I’ve been waking up at 4 or 5 or 6am without reason or prompting for a while so to have slept all the way to Jim’s 6:15 subtle jungle emanating from the bathroom where he keeps his…
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2020-04-05 Rolling Eyes and Shrugging 🙄 🤷♀️ 😢
What is a girl to do. Yesterday I was all “everything’s going my way again”, you know and am I so fragile that just like that I’m down again? It’s Sunday and I’m alone and grumpy. I’ve just finished going through the thesis preface feedback returned from my mentor a few days ago, for the…
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2020-04-04 Much Needed Relief

Somehow yesterday, even as I was lamenting the shit show my week had been, I knew that relief was on the way. I’m not sure if I had this notion because I knew it was Friday AND my period just had to start or if it was just that after several days of rotten strung…
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2020-04-03 Nebraska Kind of Moody

Two days ago it was 70 degrees and sunny. This morning I woke up to sleet and a fresh layer of snow on the ground. That’s spring In Nebraska and those wild swings kind of remind me of my mood these days. Yesterday was another really rough day. There were so many different interconnected factors…
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2020-04-02 Nowhere to Hide

There are days I’ve tried to just cruise along and behave as if it’s a normal day. I’ve worked and cared for my family and done my chores. I’ve walked and written. I’ve locked myself alone in a room to work on my thesis, shutting the whole world out, pretending it was all ok. It’s…
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2020-03-31 Crisis, Evolution, Kaczynski, and Poetry.. Oh My!
If you’re into drama and the sob-story of a broken cookie, I’m all about that today. If you’re here for the poetry, skip to the end… Yesterday I was hoping to send my thesis preface and manuscript revisions off early in the day. You know, release myself from the hold it had on me. But…
