Yesterday I had this poem knocking on my door and I was like “just a second, I gotta check my messages”. I got distracted by the day.
The same poem knocked again later in the day but when I opened the door I found only echo and silence. And that’s when I know I’m still doing this wrong.
When the poem knocks I should go running and beg it to come inside. I should drop everything and pay attention. Yes, it’s not always possible, because .. life. But what happened yesterday was avoidable. I should have made a different choice.
Especially since I’ve barely written a thing in months. You know, except for these words. I wrote what I thought was a poem on 4/20 and looked at it again last night and was like. Nope. That’s not anything but some abstractions on a page.
That’s all I have to say about that right now.
I sometimes listen to the same music/artist/playlist over and over for weeks and this morning I thought it was time for a change. I created a new playlist called “Girls Only Club”. It’s comprised of all my favorite female artists (the ones already in my music library anyway). So that’s what I’m jamming to this morning on my treadmill.
The selections range from high-school fav the Bangles to my 20’s favorites, Alannis and Avril (and I didn’t really like Avril all that much but she’s in my library). All the way to my most recent crush, T. Swift (who I’ve liked since she switched from country to pop and I’ve got 3 full albums plus a single). There is representation by Sara Barellies and Lady Gaga of course. Truth is, I don’t have a lot of female artists in my library. It’s like 5 or 6 to 1. 🤔
I should have been waking up in Minnesota this morning but our travel plans were thwarted by the Covid. It’s the first of several plans that have been crushed. My daughters prom has come and gone and her graduation is the next cancelled event. It’s not exactly canceled of course. Just rescheduled.
The virtual event will be happening May 10th and the real thing is tentatively July 10th. I hope beyond hope that things are better by then.
In June we had tickets to see Elton John in Des Moines, Iowa. That may or may not happen. My summer residency has been moved to an all-online/remote format and I’m electing not to be official at that, which defers my graduation until December.
In July my daughter and I also had a trip planned which has not been cancelled yet. I just need some good news, you know. There’s just so much upset, and it’s all political, and I can’t stand that. I can’t stand that decisions are being made because it’s what’s best for the economy. And that the health and safety of the people is a secondary consideration.
I don’t know if that’s true, and I’m sure it’s circumstantial, but that’s the way it seems.
I guess I’m just so personally torn, but it’s because there’s no actual “plan”. The people in charge are just making shit up as they go along based on the info they are given and this event is unprecedented so it’s hard to know right now what’s a mistake and what’s not.
But people getting so riled up and protesting and making it a political decision and not one based on science feels wrong.
And if President Trump would just finish out his term without talking, that would be good. That idiot says so many really stupid things. He will go down in history as the most you-tubed president of all time because of his inability to speak like a coherent human, his demeanor, and just the sheer number of dumb things that he has said on camera.
I would say “what an embarrassment for America”, but that ship sailed long ago.
That’s it for today, folks. Time to get cracking.