2020-06-17 Take Back the City Tour: Day 2

Today’s message: Permanent change is nether fast nor easy.

One of the problems with Western medicine is the notion that there can be quick fixes for most problems. Or that there’s a singular root cause of a problem which can be solved by taking a pill.

While I agree that some ills can be eased in short order with modern pharmacological methods, i would contend that the better way is to treat a person as a whole unit, mind and body. The solution to a problem has to be comprehensive and that it takes perseverance and patience.

It was another short night last night and I woke with a headache. It’s a problem, for sure, and at this point it feels like piling an old problem onto a new one. The waking up super early and not being able to fall back asleep is th he problem I tried to solve with the Xanax. Prescribed by my OB. The morning headache is also familiar and It might be because of the reduced caffeine. Or it could just be the result of where I am stuck at in my monthly cycle.

It stands to reason that if I’ve been masking problems with pills, then when I stop taking those pills the original issues will resurface. With that, I recognize that things may get worse before they get better. The short nights might suck and the headaches might be tough to deal with, but I’ve got to fight through with a healthier solution.

Easy to say on day 2 I suppose. Ask me again on day 15 or 34 or 102. The universe help me if I haven’t fixed this in that amount of time. Good gravy!

One of my friends suggested yesterday that I might be pregnant. Yeah. Nausea, light headedness, and the absence of the start of my period does sound suspect doesn’t it? Interestingly, that thought crossed my mind too but is just not possible, biologically speaking. What a Llama that would be in the SugarCookie story indeed!!

Thinking about that possibility for a hot minute was interesting though. Here I am, nearing the end of my time raising kids into adulthood. How would it be to start over. And with a different man by my side. A far better man. In some ways I could see it being such a wonderful experience and in others, I think it would be very much the same. Which isn’t to say worse, just a high likelihood that I would feel like a single parent a lot of the time because of Jim’s lack of free time. I could be wrong about that though. I will, of course, never know.

So if that’s not the Llama, what is? Yesterday I mentioned a road trip and after that had visions of taking my peeps to Colorado or the badlands. I wonder if the cabins at the badlands are open for business. That’s probably worth a little investigation.

I mentioned a road trip to Jim and he’s not really on board with that because of the risk. He’s very careful about telling me I can’t do things, but he does take a disapproving tone. I’m still not used to this part of being a couple. You know, sort of needing to agree on the right things to do all the time. I’m so used to doing whatever I want whenever I want.

Single SugarCookie might have jumped in the car and taken off already. Maybe. I can’t really say what I might have done with this pandemic if I was flying solo. 🤔

Well now. I did have the intention of writing a thoughtful post about health and making good choices and establishing better habits and I wandered around and never really got there. Oh well.

It’s almost 8 and I’m tired already and losing my motivation to take on another day. What choice do I have though? /deep sigh

I can do this. Real change takes time.
I can do this.
Time to do the day 2 thing,
~Miss SugarCookie


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