I don’t care. I’ve never been a rule breaker, and it doesn’t seem fair, but with the kind of hour, day, month I’m having I no longer care. 

Let me just tell you when I was at the grocery store a few days ago doing that self check out thing I do, I scanned the cheese. No beep. Scanned it a second time. No beep. Scanned a third time and dropped it into my grocery bag. I don’t care. Hy-vee is a rip-off anyhow charging upwards of $1 more than Wal-Mart for just about every item on the shelf. It’s true… I’ve studied this on a number of visits. I only go because they have two things the family “needs” that Wal-Mart does not carry. So it is a necessary evil every couple of weeks. And it’s my “job.” But it doesn’t mean I have to care when their EQ doesn’t work. 

You know what else? Last night I arrived back at the Buffet Cancer Center to see my mom before visiting hours were up at 6PM and I stayed all the way till 10PM. On shift change the night nurse politely told us that policy says I had to leave and my mom basically told her that THEY said I could stay to watch a show with her.

The “show” she was referring to is the bachelor. It’s about the only thing my mom and I have in common and one way for us to actually spend some QT together before she goes under the knife. After the nurse left my mom looked at me and said “Yes, I fibbed. I don’t care.” I just smiled and shrugged. I guess I didn’t either. 

They lock the building at 8:30 so when I left after the show was over (past 10PM), the big automatic doors would not open. I was like.. “Well shit, how do I get out?” 

It says across the middle of the door, “In emergency, push to open.” For real. I look around and there’s nobody. No security guards or other visitors loitering about. Not a soul. Is it an emergency? Ummmm, I suppose it depends on how trapped you feel. I mean I didn’t feel trapped but if you’ve ever stood in front of an automatic sliding door before, like at Target or something and have it not open, you know, just push on it and it opens. So I pushed. 

It didn’t budge. So I pushed a little harder. It popped open slightly. I went out and had to push it closed behind me. I was then in the vestibule and had one more door to push through. That’s exactly what I did, but this time I had to push really hard and when it popped open, a small cylindrical metal piece with rivets on it flew off from the top of the door and landed on the ground in front of me. Cool. 

As I walked to my car I kind of laughed to myself, “sorry Pam, for breaking your door.” 

I don’t care. 

***

Let me just tell you it’s now three days later and they have been looooonnnnnng days. 

Two days ago I waited in the lobby for 4 hours AFTER my mom’s surgery was supposed to be over just to go see her for like 10 minutes. Nothing like being told she’d be in her room by 6PM and still being at the hospital at 9PM. I outlasted the front desk folks that screen visitors and the security guards again. This time, I was there to watch them “lock” the doors and as I sat with my laptop and watched I wondered if they were taking extra care because some delinquent pushed through the night before. Heh!

My mom is in ICU now and will be for another day. As of this morning I had not slept more than 4 hours each night and she’s been in the hospital for a week. Because of the nature of the surgery she had she will likely be in for another week (and that’s if all goes well). I’m kind of exhausted.

I ran out of Bachelor to watch and let me just tell you, sometimes you need mindless TV. So I started watching some other random season of the Bachelorette. I’ve never watched that before so I’ll be interested to see how it’s different. 

I think that’s it for all the rules I’ve broken lately. I’m not sure what today will bring. I sure am hoping for improved sleep. 

Peace Out,
~Miss SugarCookie