I’m so tired. My sleep has been shit lately but I my creative spark has been lit and that’s probably the reason. What a trade off, huh?!

I mean, after all the blah blah woof woof about “What Next” and existential dread this year – the woe is me and “whatever will I do since I’m not writing?” It was a lot and I had finally made peace with it and was sleeping pretty great.

I’m not sure if I’m happy about this rekindling or would rather get good sleep. 

JK. 🤣

Of course I’m ecstatic about the spark and I’d trade ALL the sleeps if it meant I could enjoy more sweet sweet mystical musing emerging from the ether. 

Let me break it down… 

A few weeks ago I had a meetup with a poet friend who also just happens to have been a prof of mine during my MFA. Their enthusiasm and unwavering encouragement lifted my spirits and one of the tangible results was that I was gifted an assignment. 

We talked about the writer’s block nonsense I’ve been spewing for a while. “June” I said, “was the last time I wrote a poem.” And also that I’ve not really been trying. I pointed my blaming finger at the world on fire. 🔥 

They asked me if I’d ever read the fire sermon. No, I’d never even heard of it. 

My assignment, then, was to read the fire sermon and then write a poem. Just like that. They were going to write one too, so there was some comradery and accountability in it.

And you know what? I did it. The sermon itself was kind of dry but the message was clear and as I let it roll around my mind and mingle with other angst burning inside me, I came away with two+ pages of writing. It is yet untitled, but I’m certain  there’s a poem hiding in all those lines.  

That was the start. 

After I wrote it, I was inspired to seek out other assignments. I signed up for an “Advent” calendar that provides a prompt a day for the whole month of December and I’ve been prioritizing writing something for that each day. 

The days I’ve been most successful have been those where I’ve looked at them off first thing in the morning, for now, before talking to anyone or doing anything else. 

Today is obviously day 10 because it’s December 10 and I have three or four solid starter pieces that could turn into something more if I keep working on them. One of the good things about this, however, is that once I’ve written something it gets stashed away. I’m not spending too much time on it and can move on to the rest of what I need to get done each day. 

Those little Google Docs will persist in my drive and will be waiting for me when I want to work on revision and have time. 

The downside, that I have already mentioned, is that it’s kind of messing with my sleep. I’m actually looking forward to waking up each day and gifting myself quiet time without interruption while everyone else is still sleeping to write. For some reason, though, it doesn’t matter if I wake up at one or three or 5 AM. My brain feels wide, awake and ready to roll.

This is not my first rodeo with this type of sleep issue. Whenever I’m excited about a project or looking forward to something in the imminent future, I don’t sleep that long. And then I can’t go back to sleep.

Like I said… if it breaks the curse,  I’ll take it. I would rather be writing than get good sleep any day.

At least for now. Ask me again in a few weeks after I’ve gone completely crazy from lack of sleep. 😜

It’s OK, everyone else is crazy too because it’s December, and winter, and the holidays. I won’t seem out of place next to the rest of that nonsense.

That’s it for now. I can’t even get a real cardio session in. I just don’t have it in me.

Peace and prosperity, until the next time,

~Miss SugarCookie