A few days ago it was the Ides of March and I didn’t even remember or notice. How could I when the whole week had gone horribly wrong. It was a real roller coaster of migraine and neck pain and emotional turmoil. I’d barely crawled out of one hole just to find I was in an even deeper, steeper one. No kidding. 

I suppose historically I would have headed to the gym to sweat and write my heart out on some glorious elliptical machine, but those days have faded and are now a six years ago daydream. Six years ago the picture of my life and a snapshot of the latest heartbreak or headache looks so dissimilar to today that a person wouldn’t even recognize me in the frame. 

But hi. It’s me. I’m still the problem. It’s me. 

(Thanks Taylor).

Recognizing that regardless of the true source, the issues I face are mine alone to sort through and solve. I own the puzzle and all the pieces. So what’s this latest round all about? 

Sleeping wrong and terrible neck pain. An acute ache that reaches over the back of my head and tightens the tension that’s ever present in my temples. Oh my poor temporal lobe. I’m still trying to fix my sleep posture and find the right pillow. It’s a struggle and one bad night can spell doom for the day to follow. 

Pausing there, I’ll just say 10 years ago I never thought about sleep posture. Is that even a thing? How did I know that my deep love for stomach sleeping would one day turn on me and make me regret the first moment I flipped over in my sleep and found bliss. But now, my aging body can’t take it. Not even for one REM cycle. So I’m trying to learn how to sleep on my back, or even my side. But you see, this is just the tip…

Of the iceberg. 😂

I wake with pain and a terrible headache. I have a protocol for that. I’m sure some other chronic migraine sufferers know what I’m talking about. Step one is to take OTC meds, especially if the headache does not include classic migraine symptoms. Mine are nausea and sensitivity to light and movement. 

I go the OTC route which includes Tylenol or ibuprofen plus an antihistamine and/or decongestant. Allegra D is my go to for daytime and Benadryl if it’s getting close to bed time. It also matters if I’ve eaten whether I take Tylenol or ibuprofen. I hate eating when I’m not hungry because it sends a mixed signal to my system if I’m trying to do the intermittent fasting thing (another ongoing saga best saved for another day).

If I’ve eaten recently it’s ibuprofen for sure. If not, I go with Tylenol plus aspirin and maybe caffeine. This week has been killer and OTC shit takes the edge off but not enough for me to be able to work or even take care of basic tasks. When doing dishes feels like climbing a mountain, that’s when prescription meds are needed. But that’s also a tough line to walk. They work. Really well. 

They usually quell any headache in 30 minutes or less. Then I’m me again. Then I feel great. And sometimes I think this euphoria of relief is so magical that it boosts my mood. It’s a boost a girl can really get used to. It’s like I’ve got caffeine and adrenaline and can conquer things that typically seem daunting. It’s superb. This feeling. But it comes at a cost. 

According to the facts, a person should not exceed 2 doses in 24 hours and not have more than 4 doses a month. Whoa. That’s not a lot, especially when I’m having a “mercury in retrograde” kind of month. I don’t know exactly why that’s the limit of dosing, what the repercussions are, but I can imagine it has something to do with dependence. 

Before I knew there was a limit, I’d exceeded it and where I found myself was a vicious cycle of recurring migraines. This is sometimes called a rebound headache, and is like a withdrawal symptom. The very thing that treats the headache and pain causes even worse headache and pain when the medicine dissipates in the system. 

Super fun. 

When I found myself in this spiral last year, I ended up in the infusion center at my doctor’s office having their migraine therapy treatment. It worked, and that’s how I ended up with the new first step protocol. So on those days I wake with a headache and pain, whether it’s sleep posture related or something else, I suffer through the OTC test first. 

Twice in the last week it didn’t help and I had to pull the trigger on taking eletriptan. That’s the long acting Triptan that’s supposed to relieve symptoms from an acute migraine and last for 48 hours. It’s also supposed to minimize the possibility of a rebound. Which clearly in this case did not work. 

Ok. Now that I’ve done a deep dive into the start of the story and the “what” that I don’t have time for the “rest of the story.” But my tendrils of thought snake in three different directions…

1. What specific events besides sleep posture have created such a triggering environment. 
2. The circumstance of my aging and aching physical body that have contributed. 
3. How specifically is now so different than 6 years ago. 
4. What I’m planning to do about it this time around.
5. (I’m not writing about the Ides of March again, however relevant it is for this past week).

It spirals out from there. There’s always more. But then the time runs out and with another cardio session coming to a close, my motivation wanes. Plus I’ve got work to do that needs to get done before the house wakes up. 

Perhaps part two will be the antidote and bring the clarity I seek. If you read this far, thanks for reading. And if you read this far and have an opinion on which of the four sequels listed above seems the most enticing, please leave a comment. 

Peace and love, 

~Miss SugarCookie