Two days ago I forgot it was the Ides and today I forgot it’s Saint Patrick’s Day (until about 20 minutes ago). I Guess that’s just what happens when I crawl deeper back into the cave of my own little life and shut out the rest of the world. I would say this cave / bubble/ whatever you want to call it is my happy place but what is happiness anyway?

Funny that’s the question I’m asking myself today. But it’s not really funny is it? Maybe I just mean funny as in peculiar. 

Language is strange. Remind me again why I’m in the language business? Why make the pursuit of meaning making a business? Is it in the name of happiness?

Three+ rhetorical questions later and I’m back where I started…  what is happiness? 

We’ll for one thing it’s an emotion. And like all emotions it’s fleeting. So saying you are free to pursue happiness just means you can wake up each morning and try again. So long as you are alive.

I could say happiness is a feeling of joy but pairing two abstractions doesn’t really help in the making of meaning. What helps are concrete examples. To do that, I’ve got to dig in and reveal the details. 

Yesterday I felt an immense amount of happiness when my kids and I played board games for 8+ hours and had not one but two meals together. We had a great time and got super silly learning how to play Terraforming Mars. And despite the fact I got third place, it was tons of fun and I was oozing with happy.

I didn’t even realize until we were done at 1AM that I’d forgotten my phone in another room of the house. That’s happiness!!

We also played Catan and I can be a boss at that game but it was past 11pm when we started and I was so brain dead. I only had 5 VP when they both had 8 or 9. Their race to 10 was heated and it was like I wasn’t even in the room. Ha! 

Anyway… happiness is quality time with loved ones. Just like the afternoon I spent earlier this week with my Z. It was just the two of us on Tuesday and she taught me how to crochet.

I know I’ve done a good job parenting when my daughter is the one teaching me how to do something. 💗

I made a little ball and she started a new project… 14 squares with sunflowers in the middle that will ultimately be stitched together to form a little bag. She impresses me more and more all the time. I’m a proud mama for sure.

And happy. 

When I think about the pursuit of happiness, I can’t help but recognize that I put so much effort and energy into endeavors that don’t bring me joy. There are obligations and responsibilities, sure, but I’m talking about the projects I’m trudging through most days that only take away joy or add angst to my overall mood or just take away time I could be doing something more enjoyable. 

Again.. the devil is in the details so the specifics are necessary for a complete picture. 

Without doing a deep dive, I’ll just say it has to do with writing and publishing and most of the work I do for the journal. Make no mistake… it’s ALL work. And like any work, there’s a certain amount of obligation attached, however, I’m the one who accepted the responsibility for that work so I have to see it through. I can’t just quit when it’s not fun anymore. 

At least with the journal I can’t. But with my own personal pursuits I absolutely can. I just have to figure out how to navigate my way to a different operational approach. That’s a fancy way of saying I need to figure out what to do differently and how.

I think I’m wandering into territory, now that requires more time and thought, and probably should be a separate topic altogether.

Plus, GusGus has just requested some deep meditation and so I think my treadmill time is over.

Oh yeah… my kitties also provide me with much happiness.

More soon. Maybe.

Peace and Love,

~Miss SugarCookie