After my last post a friend of mine messaged me and said “good luck doing nothing.” Or something like that and it’s true… I set an intention for June to do less. I wanted to minimize the pressure I constantly feel to do more or counterbalance that feeling that I’m never doing enough. How frustrating it is, to move through the world with a constant nagging at the back of the brain (and sometimes the front). 

“You are not good enough” 

“You should be doing more” 

“If you tried a little harder maybe you’d feel better, you would be a winner instead of a loser, people would love you….”

And on and on, blah-blah-woof-woof, whatever. 

Whatever! 

WHATEVER!! 

So I set an intention to shut those voices the hell up. I put some weight into it by clearly listing 10 things I was NOT gonna do. 

So how did I do not doing nothin?  Well it turns out, a goal to do less is harder to achieve than you’d think. 

Some of it was incredibly easy, but other things I forgot about three days after I posted. It wasn’t until last week that I came back around to it and discovered I had truly forgotten most of it. But that’s of little consequence if I felt good about the overall outcome and my life balance. 

Putting words where my mind is will help me sort through it, one list item at a time… 

What I promised myself I would not do:

1. Submit new work to publications. I submitted something only once and that was already on my radar because it was a place that’s only open one a year in June. Otherwise this goal was surprisingly easy despite my history. I just let it go, logged all the rejections as they came in, and was not tempted to jump right in and send something else. I’ve decided to keep letting this go for a while. It feels good to let it go. And the amount of time I saved was pretty great.
2. Work on TGLR future plans. Or any future plans for that matter but TGLR is the biggest time suck. I was mostly successful with this. Yes, a few times it snuck into my brain and I spent a little time but I never sat down to make a plan. I had some thoughts and just let them go. Unlike the submissions, though, I can’t continue to let it go. Change is needed soon and I want to work out my thoughts on it. This will happen in July. 
3. Weigh myself. Yeah… I failed this one big time. It was one of those I forgot was on my list and when I came home from the road trip with my daughter, I got right back on the scale on the regular and have been since. What’s a girl to do? 🤷‍♀️
4. Try to write anything new. Also easy. I wrote a few things but only for funsies and then put it away when I felt frustrated by it or decided it wasn’t going somewhere fruitful. I also didn’t think or worry about blogging or documenting the road trip which was nice. 
5. Attend any writer workshops or readings or events except for the one feedback event already on the June calendar. Again, mostly a success. I attended a workshop on June 28 that was already paid for, but that was it. Maybe I limit myself to one event a month. That would be a good balance, right?
6. Check on my parents beyond letting them know I won’t be around (and that I’m going to be on vacation). Eh. This is tough. It’s hard not to think or worry when there’s lots of communication and shit going on. I let it go for vacation, but like weighing myself, it picked right back up when I returned home. Good news is that there’s no bad news. Fingers crossed that holds in July. 
7. Worry about recycling. All I can say about this is that I did better. Not perfect because it’s tough to stop caring so much but I did better with things that are outside of my control. 
8. Check in on my book or worry about it. I did this, and the Universe gifted me with a meeting with my publisher. That was great and I now have a release date but the work remaining falls mostly on the press and not me, so I can continue to not worry about it unless I need to make a decision, like on cover artwork.
9. Log workouts or worry that I am not doing enough physical activity. Also super easy and not thinking about it allowed me more time and a better balance overall. 
10. Worry about indulging in foods I love or giving in to cravings. I’ll admit I had to work at this one, but the older I get, the easier not worrying about this becomes. I want to enjoy life and everything it has to offer. That includes coffee with cream and sugar and it includes dessert. 

So that was the list. See I did ok. And for most things I can try to let it ride in July. 

Yeah, I can say with confidence that it was a success. Forgetting about it is kind of a testament to success too. It means I wasn’t worrying about things. If I had been, I’d have been trying to stop and remind myself of my goal. So that’s a win! 

Winner winner chicken dinner. 

Everything’s cool, long as I’m gettin’ thinner. 

(I’m not, but it’s ok. I’m still good with that too. It helps knowing I’ll be loved by people who I care about regardless of how much I weigh).

Until laterz, 

~Miss SugarCookie